Saturday, October 24, 2009

Casting a Torso

The last member orientation at our original facility happened this afternoon, then on the way home we picked up scrumptious Chinese food take out.

Then Jason cast my breasts and my belly, so we can always visually recollect the size and shape of my pregnant self. Some time in the coming weeks, we will be painting the finished product.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Erotic Birthday Cake Vancouver

This afternoon was my bi-weekly appointment with the obstetrician. He is such a kind and jolly man, that he can easily be described as Santa Claus with a turban. I'm enamored which is good, as one should like and trust their doctor this much.

Jason and I went together to the mid day check up and when we were finally called into the doc's office, I had my list ready.

My arm is killing me and I have no idea why. It's my non dominant one and the shooting pain at night is keeping me awake.

My back is aching terribly and even the prescription pregnancy massage is not helping.

And finally, the biggest issue of them all. I am DONE being a human incubator. I need this baby removed from me immediately.

Each complaint he heard well, and nodded along to appropriately as the medical student in his office weighed me, took my blood pressure and measured my belly's growth.

Then I got quiet, staring at him and waiting for his answers.

My arm issue is pregnancy related carpal tunnel syndrome stemming from edema. A professionally fitted support wrist and forearm device will alleviate much of the discontent.

My back, more massage, more relaxing and soon that pain will just end on its own.

Ending the pregnancy. Ok, it is possible and he would consider doing so IF, and only IF I consent to a amniotic fluid test to determine the babys lung strength first. This is the illusion of choice. I'll be damned if I am going to let anyone stick a long, long thin needle through my belly while I am awake.

So what does all this mean? Well we purchased the arm brace yesterday on the way home, I plan on attempting to rest more and the baby stays inside of me.

The doctor did say that I'll be seeing him every week now that I am so far along. (33.5 weeks) I casually dropped the bomb to him that I hope he is prepared for my continuous grumblings and demands that he take this child out. His response ... "well I was sort of thinking that seeing you weekly would dilute your complaints". He is such a sweet sweet man.

The one thing he did say that makes me feel some what better is that if I continue to want this baby out, then at 38 weeks he would make it happen. It's true I have had a horrible third trimester. Wisdom teeth removal, dry socket, the loss of my mucus plug, premature labor, carpal tunnel and a few other womanly issues that I care to not even mention here. It has been rather taxing emotionally and physically.

I came out of that appointment somewhat disappointed as I really did have high hopes that I could bribe him in some way to end my pregnancy and give me my son. Jason came out the appointment somewhat giggly at my demands (I had forewarned him) and also amused at how well the doctor "handled me".

We came home and I crawled into a hot tub, for a long soak. It was heavenly. Then I dried myself off, dressed and we headed out to a rather full Exploratorium. It was a great night at work. One of our members even brought me a Happy Birthday cake...complete with breasts, a nipple ring and sporting a chocolate dipped penis mounted in an edible strap-on as part of the package. It was wonderful. Thanks D & S!

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Birthday Fast Approaching

Another photo from the photo shoot the other day. I like this one too, Todd did an amazing job with me, especially given how crappy I have felt lately.

In six days it is my 37th birthday, and these days do I ever feel old. In fact, I am looking for a pair of slippers .... sexy ones ... not granny ones and they must have no heel and be non slip. Any leads where I can get my feet into some?

Last night at Deviant Dining was a really good dinner, wonderful guests who were highly engaged in some incredible conversations and a host of connections made between members whom had not met before. Plus one member brought me a birthday present, plus a gift for the baby. I came home happy, over full and grateful to be surrounded by such wonderful community.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Thirty Three Weeks along

To be perfectly honest, I feel like shit.

I barely slept at all last night. The baby inside of me had the hiccups for hours on end which kept me awake against my will and a pinched nerve in my arm was causing me horrid physical distress. Many, many tears were shed.

Today marks my 33rd week of pregnancy. And I feel very uncomfortable. I am not at all happy as of late. Don't get me wrong, I am super eager to get this child out of me as these final weeks are a real struggle for my body and pregnancy is no longer a joyful time.

All I want is to meet my son, get my body back and resume my life without discontent.

It is a good thing there are so many wonderful friends that support me and a family that goes the extra mile because I am needing the love right now.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Head Shot

A Lounge Member spent some time this evening with me and we did a photo shoot. This is one of the finished images. I need these for upcoming media publications and assorted other printed materials.

I like this one, a lot.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Crazy Life of Mine

There is so much on my plate right now.

I had to cancel my massage therapy appointment this week due to a triple booking the same day, during the same time period. Balancing everything I have going on is a definite challenge lately.

Right now I am supposed to be working on a legal suit that I am involved in that is before the courts in less than three weeks. Yet I lack the stamina necessary to put together the documents I should be preparing, perhaps later today I'll get to it.

I have commissioned a woman to make me a four foot tall penis and a four foot tall vulva for an upcoming large educational production that I have been hired to star in. Once this post is written I owe her a phone call so we can continue on plotting the execution of this outrageous project.

We returned home from the US late last night, and though we managed to put away all of our purchases, the suitcases still need to be unpacked and some serious laundry must be taken care of.

After emptying my telephones, there is a tidy list of eleven different people that I have to phone and deal with.

Tonight is new member orientation at The Lounge and there are seven inductees scheduled to be in class.

And to top off this day from hell, I am nauseous, still. I went to bed with a big bowl next to me and still this afternoon my stomach is rather queasy and unsettled for some reason.

I am finally pregnant enough that I no longer see the obstetrician monthly, rather these days, it is every two weeks as finally we are on the countdown till the birth of our son. Friday I see the doctor again and I can complain about my pained back and wrists, and rumbly tummy.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Sacred Sex Magic

My dear friend Julie sent this to me and asked that I pass it along to anyone interested.....

Ecstasy. Boundaries. Attraction. Sensuality. Desire.

Our sacred sexuality is a birthright beyond the ability to procreate, as a source of incredible joy and sometimes frustration. We welcome all the pieces of our sexual selves in the gorgeous paradox of being broken and whole. Together we will awaken or refresh a deep relationship with our unique sexual life force. We seek to know our own sex energy intimately in order to bring it fully into the world, through relationships and magic.

Working with sexual energy can challenge us on many levels and willingness to participate fully is important -- however, please know that you will not be asked to sexually interact with another. Please be pagan friendly and comfortable with creating sacred space and working with guided meditation or trance. We welcome adults of all genders and orientations.

This work will presented in a series of three weekend workshops.

Dates: January 23rd & 24th, March 13th & 14th, May 15th & 16th
Time: 10:00 AM - 4:00 PM all days

Cost: $375-450 sliding scale. Or $300 if paid in full by December 23rd.

Where: Seattle area

Contact: Hekate at for information and registration, and if you're interested in scholarships or work trade


Ravyn Stanfield is an acupuncturist, writer, lover, artist and activist dedicated to bringing more magic and erotic revolution into the world through the cracks in Western civilization. She teaches workshops internationally and in the Oregon prison system. She has been involved with Reclaiming since 1996.

Dawn Isidora is hypnotherapist, spiritual counselor and writer. Her work is guided by the wisdom of the Elements and focuses on the workings of relationships, whether they be with oneself, others, or the Gods. Dawn has been teaching magic and earth spirituality, in Oregon and abroad for over fifteen years. She first became involved with Reclaiming while living in San Francisco in 1983.