Gender Curious

I'm really sitting on the fence over an issue and quite frankly I do not know which way to go. It's a really tough decision and one not to be taken lately. Further it goes against what I have done in past and I want to feel good about the choice, whatever it is.

When I was pregnant the first time round, I was a young young woman, not very mature at all, though I certainly felt so at the time. I announced to my then partner that we would not seek to find out the gender of our unborn child, because a surprise would be most welcome. We waited and did not know until the birth that we had a daughter. The delight was huge and the occasion so celebratory.

Now here I am pregnant again all these years later, and I am uncertain what to do. It's not that I don't like surprises any more, it is more that I am more mature now.

As a mature adult woman, with some worldly experience, I would like to be able to plan better with this pregnancy. I think. It would be so wonderful to just have to think out the name for one gender or the other. What joy I would find in being able to shop for items appropriate for the baby. We're moving into our own home and the nursery can be painted and set up in either boy or girl fashion.

Today I was in a store meandering through the baby section and was caught up in the choices of wee clothes, it's been forever since I shopped for little people clothing. In my hand I grasped a few different items that struck my fancy and truth be told, I almost bought them but then thought better of it.

I don't know what I should be buying. Really, I think I want to know this time. Is this so wrong?

When the man got home from work this evening I shared with him my woes. He kissed me on the forehead while laughing at me and calling me "cute". He says I'm nesting.

I talked him through my thought process of the day and quite frankly he was no help with coming to a firm decision either way. His words "I'm going to love our baby no matter the gender so does it matter if we find out now or later"?

Are there other freedoms that come from knowing the gender in advance? Are there any draw backs to finding out in advance?

I think I want to know, I just do not know for sure yet.