Wednesday, August 31, 2005

asked on a date at work

At work this afternoon, standing alone in a mind set of work related non sex topics, reading a clip board before a shelf when suddenly next to me is a man. Tall, fit, good looking, dark hair, late thirties, he smiles warmly right at me, brightly, a flash of white teeth and enthusiasm, his eyes meet mine and lock in.

Hi he says. "I saw you last week when you were working here and I'd wanted to ask you something then, but then you left and I thought I'd missed the opportunity as I'd never seen you here before." sighs Now before I can say anything past hello to him, as he just paused for breath here, smiles at me again at which point his eyes light up and he says "I was wondering if I could ask you out on a date?" More smiling and he leans towards me a little and I hear myself say, "I'm so flattered, thank you so much for the kind offer, but I'm already taken. My partner a woman and I have been together for years now and are quite happy."

"Now that we've had this little visit, let me introduce myself I say to him", my name is Jennifer. I extend my hand to shake his as he tells me his name and continues to tell me how much of a struggle it is to meet someone these days and how he found me attractive, different and friendly and thought he'd try asking me out.

How sweet to be asked out on a date and by someone who has no clue what I do in the rest of my life as a sex activist. Very cool, made my day. He took my being partnered to a woman well and didn't bat an eye over it, thankfully. Why did I tell him I was partnered to a woman and not a man you might be wondering.

It goes like this, I prefer at work (at my day job) for being thought of as unavailable and by telling men I'm with a woman, well, word travels fast and I'm left alone for the most part from that meat market. Plus it's not a lie it's the truth, well the actual truth is that I have two women partners.

If I'd told him I was with a man then I would if interested enough in going out on a date with this new man, would have needed to have told him that I practice poly and I'm again not prepared to do that at work.

I also practice no false hopes. Lead no one on ever. If I'm here to talk & flirt you'll know the difference with me from when you feel my desire to seduce or fuck you. Say what I mean or what I want always, and do so with honesty & conviction. Be forthcoming about what I have to offer and not offer. Tell who I am, how I love and the boundaries that surround a relationship with me.

Lest we forget that I'm kinky beyond belief and with this fact alone in mind, I should never date anyone at work. Good practice for me.

And further to any of the above, how would I have explained my relationships with kara, Allena, Doug and Jim? ha

Jennifer