Difficiulties

Visualize for a moment what I am about to share with you.

It's very, very late at night. Close to midnight and I've been awake since 7 in the morning ... this means that I am rather tired.

I am walking down the hallway from the living room towards the bathroom and bedrooms in the dark of night.

I'm only wearing capri pajama bottoms.

Attached to my left breast and laying in my left arm is a 13 pound baby nursing periodically as he puts himself to sleep.

In my right hand is my IV bag, which is rather hefty.

My bladder is about to burst so I make a pit stop for the toilet. This is when I realize I am going to have a struggle getting my pants down.

I could call out for Jason, but that would wake the baby. Instead, I grab the bottom end of one pajama leg with my toes on my right foot and pull. Then do the same with the left foot. Then when my pants are low enough I sit and pee.

I drop the IV bag to the floor, grab some toilet paper and wipe all the while in the pitch black of the bathroom. The sound of my pee hitting the water has stirred the wee man.

Before I stand up, I kick off my pants as they are now low enough to do so. Then I grab the IV bag from the floor and attempt to get up without shifting so much that I wake the person with the power to keep me awake for even longer.

Now I shuffle off to bed where I lay my pump by my head. Put the tubes under the pillow and then strategically maneavour myself into a somewhat comfortable position for sleep. What's most important is the bundle of joy laying next to me, has in his mouth my breast STILL.

Sometime in the next thirty minutes or so, he'll pop my nipple out and I'll be free for about four hours, to sleep without him hanging off of me.

The pump and tubes however will remain as a constant for a few more weeks yet.

Navigating day to day living is an honest to goodness challenge right now, and I wish nothing more to be back to normal sooner rather than later.