Fail

And with a THUD, the shoe bounced off the hallway wall and promptly ricocheted across the room falling to the ground as abruptly as it had taken flight.

My chest tightened, my breath got short and I could barely think straight.

My god damn wallet was missing and I just knew, that it had been lost.

Convinced of it's disappearance, and believing it never to see the light of day again, my anxiety was through the roof.

"I can't do it anymore, I just can't ..... there is not enough of me to go around" ...."I fucking give up". And then, I stormed out of the room vibrating with angst.

Twenty minutes later of back tracking through my life, numerous phone calls and digging through bags and VOILA. There stood Jason in front of me, holding my Ed Hardy wallet.

Not missing, not stolen, simply misplaced. By me. I had misplaced my wallet and my whole outburst was irrational and unnecessary.

It was all I could do to steer myself into a kitchen chair. Jason pulled up a seat next to me. With out a word, he just gazed deeply into my eyes with such love and compassion, all I could do was sob uncontrollably.

When I able to grab hold of my composure, all I could say was, "I'm sorry".

I'm so sorry that I can't do it all. I'm sorry that I'm having a hard time being everything I want to be. I'm - just - sorry.

So that's my story and I am sticking to it.

Our baby is nine a half months old. Our business is almost three years old. This is a time of tremendous growth again for me personally and professionally. And navigating it, is challenging me.

To remedy this situation and to alleviate some of the pressure I am feeling as a working mother, we are now investigating part time day care.

Now that you know where I am at in life, let's return to regular scheduled programming and blogging.